The Muddy Guide: What’s On 29 Jul – 5 Aug
From doggy doings to stage explosions, drive-in classic films to genital origami (ouch), there’s plenty on this week in the Muddy Guide. For heaps more ideas for what to do with kids this summer. Check out for my bumper school holidays guide
Dog Fun Day, Woolbeding Countryside, 31 July
There’s Sunday fun for dog lovers at Woolbeding with agility and working dog demonstrations, stalls and more. Watch, or bring your pooch to take part. There’ll also be the chance to get advice on how your dog can get along better with livestock and wildlife. 10.30am – 3.00pm, free entry, £1 per class.
Sussex Ox, music and beer festival, near Polegate, 5, 6, 7 Aug
The Sussex Ox is hosting its second annual music and beer festival over a long August weekend. More than 20 different real ales and ciders from Sussex and beyond will be available to enjoy with live music from a host of bands. A BBQ with burgers made with beef from the pub’s own organic farm will be served in the fantastic garden. The event’s free but book ahead if you want a table for lunch or dinner.
Regis Theatre, Bognor Regis, Alan Bennett’s Talking Heads, 29 Jul
Alan Bennetts’ bittersweet Talking Heads monologues are among my favourite things ever to have appeared on TV. Now you can catch three of them – Bed Among the Lentils, Soldiering On and A Cream Cracker Under the Settee being performed at the Regis Centre (tickets £10). Failing that, come round my house and I can probably quote you chunks.
World Cup ’66 Live, The Capital, Horsham, 30 Jul
Somehow I don’t think people will be looking back on 2016 as a vintage year for England’s football performance. We have to look back fifty years for a moment of glory and The Capital Horsham is set to remind us what it was like to feel like winners with an anniversary screening of live events and vintage footage to mark the 66 World Cup final. There’ll be music from the time performed by today’s artists, appearances from football heroes and more. Watch the trailer here … (unless, you know, you don’t want to know the score..)
The Hollywood Special Effects Show, The Hawth, Crawley, 5 Aug
Feel the heat of an onstage inferno, marvel at gruesome sci-fi monsters, be blown away by apocalyptic weather and hold on tight through huge explosions – the The Hollywood Special Effects Show is back! An air canon, an animatronic dinosaur and pyrotechnics galore are promised and this year the audience can get closer to the action than ever before. There’ll even be bullet proof glass round the stage for some explosions. Sounds a blast. Tickets cost, £14 or £15.50 for the ‘Danger Zone’. The show is suitable for children 6+.
Festival of Racing, Aug 3, Brighton Racecourse 3-5 Aug
The highlight of the Brighton Racecourse calendar – the Festival of Racing – kicks off on Wed 3 Aug with the John Smith Raceday featuring the Brighton Mile and moves on to Ladies’ Day on the Thurs – your chance to wear a big fancy hat. Fri sees the Festival Finale with sprint race ‘the Brighton Bullet’. Tables in Silks Restaurant have already sold out for Ladies’ Day and the finale and it’s best to book ahead for all tickets.
Zoo Summer Club, Drusillas, w/c Aug 1 and Aug 8
For the first time, Muddy Awards finalist Drusillas is hosting two summer clubs with behind-the-scenes chances to meet the animals. Children will get involved with project and group work and learn about animals and conservation following themes. Sessions for 6- to 10- year-olds run on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays in the weeks commencing 1 Aug and 8 Aug. You can book kids in for one day, or all three. There are only places for 15 children each week, so given the popularity of Drusillas you need to get on it like, now! It costs £65 a day with discounts for siblings and those with annual membership. Club days runs from 10.30 – 3.30pm, and there’ll be an hour reserved for play.
Latitude Festival Takeover, South Bank, London, 5-7 Aug and free events until 29 Aug
Suffolk’s Latitude festival is coming a little closer this August, taking over London’s South Bank with a mix of music, theatre, dance and literature. Highlights include comic country and western act Tina C; the award-winning Action To The Word’s new production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream; a collaboration between a group of artists and children’s novelist and poet Michael Rosen, musical bingo and a swing dance class. The Latitude takeover is part of a wider free outdoor festival every Friday, Saturday and Sunday from 29 Jul until 29 Aug at the River Stage outside the National Theatre with theatre, guest DJs, live music in the afternoon and late evening, family activities and more.
The Three Little Pigs, Devonshire Park Theatre, Eastbourne, 2, 4, 6 & 7 Aug
A curly musical tale full of catchy songs and jokes for little-ones, from award-wining show writers. It’s an updated telling of the classic with the big bad wolf pitted against cunning piglets trying to save their bacon. Recommended for ages 3+ with one daytime performance on the Tues, Thurs and Sat and two on the Sun. Tickets cost £13.50.
Puppetry of the Penis, The Hawth, Crawley, 12 Aug
They’re still at it and they haven’t gone blind. The famous show is back in which two near naked men manipulate their nether regions to comic effect. See their ‘genital origami’ classics like the Eiffel Tower, the Loch Ness Monster, the Hamburger and, new this year, Yoda, and err the Kardashians (the mind boggles). Tickets cost £21.50. It’s a non-sexual show but does contain full frontal nudity with, they warn, traces of nut.
Drive-in Finding Dory, Calamity Jane and Casablanca, Oaklands Car Park, Chichester, 6 and 7 Aug
If you don’t book this you’re going to regret it… maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow… Classic 1942 love triangle Casablanca is being shown on the UK’s biggest ever outdoor screen as part of the Chichester Film Festival. Audio will be transmitted through your car radio, clever eh? And of course, as you’re inside your car you can recite along to all those famous lines without annoying anyone. Tickets are £29 per car in advance, £35 on the day. On the previous day – Aug 6 – there’s Finding Dory and Doris Day in Calamity Jane. The film festival continues to 28 Aug.